encoded notions

I made a little parody of the Brady Bunch theme song. I hope you like it:

Here’s the story of a heartless she-bitch, Who was bringing up three bitches of her own. All of them had hearts of ice, like their mother, The youngest one gets stoned.

It’s the story, of a drunken bastard, Who was left to raise three assholes by his ex. They were four pricks living all together, All they wanted was sex.

Til one day when the she-bitch met this bastard, And they had a few too many rum & cokes. When they woke, they found out they got married, That’s the way their kids discovered “naughty pokes.”

Compare to the original:

Here’s the story of a lovely lady, Who was bringing up three very lovely girls. All of them had hair of gold, like their mother, The youngest one in curls.

It’s the story of a man named Brady, Who was busy with three boys of his own. They were four men living all together, Yet they were all alone.

Til the one day when the lady met this fellow, And they knew that it was much more than a hunch, That this group would somehow form a family, That’s the way they became the Brady Bunch.

The fun part about the Brady Bunch is that there is no way that any family could be that happy and pristine and free of outside negative influences. So behind every scene you’d think, I wonder what these characters do in between episodes. Does Jan work for Hooters? Does Bobby sell weed to his friends at school? What happens when Mr. & Mrs. Brady are alone and very, very drunk?

At least we got a taste of that “reality” with one of the two Brady Movies (I forget which one). The older step-brother and step-sister make out—which is not something you’d ever see on the original series.