A while ago I was thinking about Star Trek and I got to thinking about The Borg. Whenever they get the urge to obliterate a ship and its assimilate its living “contents” they spout out this monologue:
We are the Borg. Lower your shields and surrender your ships. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.
On a whim I fabricated a similar thing for Walmart to say to other storefronts:
We are Walmart. Close your doors and surrender your shops. We will add your economical and creative distinctiveness to our own. Your customers will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.
Down with Walmart! There is a very funny episode of South Park out there that makes fun of mega-stores.